


Deepest Darkest Desires

by coldskin (orphan_account)



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, But doesn't see Amara, But his actual true love, Dean Denies it, Dean fights the Qareen, Fighting, Hallucinations, His Deepest Darkest Desire, Instead he sees Castiel, It isn't Amara, Kissing, M/M, POV Dean Winchester, at least at first
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-19
Updated: 2016-08-19
Packaged: 2018-08-09 07:19:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,129
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7792048
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/coldskin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Where Dean and Sam are fighting a Qareen but it isn't Amara that Dean sees.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Deepest Darkest Desires

**Author's Note:**

> Honestly, I just finished the episode (s11, ep13) and this came out of nowhere. 
> 
> All characters in this does not belong to me and some of the dialogue comes from the actual show. Other than that, it is a work a pure fiction of my own.

Dean lifts his hand up towards Sam in a silent suggestion. Sam stares at the hand for a moment before sighing and lifting up his own. They play two rounds of rock, paper, scissors, Sam's mind knowing he'll win. He always wins.

That is until Dean lays down a flat palm and Sam holds out a fist. Dean seems just as surprised as Sam, looking at him with wide eyes.

"Whatever. I'm going upstairs," The taller brother says, turning to leave.

"Okay," Dean replies, a bit breathless. He smiles widely, turning and pushing the plastic curtains away dramatically. He could hear Sam's pounding steps moving upwards and he wanders around the basement, shining his flashlight here and there.

The minutes pass with no disturbances and Dean grows bored at searching through the cupboards full of hair utensils. He turns off his flashlight, throwing his head back in exasperation. He sighs dramatically and continues searching.

Soft footfalls sound from behind him and Dean assumes its Sam.

"Did you find anything?" He calls, turning to look at the silhouette. The plastic drapes are pulled apart and - it isn't Sam.

Castiel stands there, tilting his head slightly.

"Cas," He breathes out, glad to see his friend after so many days apart, "How'd you know-"

A sudden thought occurs to him and he remembers the Qareen. He takes a few steps back.

"You're not Cas," He states. Castiel - the Qareen - furrows his eyebrows.

"How am I not?" He asks, voice gruff and quiet.

"You're the Qareen. But - why? Cas?" He asks, mind jumbled with millions of different thoughts as to why the Qareen has taken Castiel's form of all people.

"Do you not understand? Your heart does. Your deepest darkest _desire_ ," Castiel says taking a few steps closer. Dean shakes his head quickly.

"No," He gasps and stumbles, back hitting the wall.

"No? Do you not want me? I know you do. I know you spend nights wallowing in shame of your feelings towards me. You try to deny it but I can see through you," He says, voice dropping an octave, if that's possible, "You can have me. You must know that I want you too, Dean."

He's inching closer and Dean's eyes flicker to the metal rod a few feet from him. He shifts, feet stepping towards it and Castiel does the same. They move slowly, Castiel's eyes searching his.

"You're not him," Dean answers, swallowing thickly.

"I could be," Castiel whispers and Dean takes another step towards the rod. Castiel follows his moves.

"I don't want you - him," Dean reprimands, voice shaking.

"Of course you do. Why deny it?" Castiel's eyes flicker to the rod that is now mere inches from him. Dean knows he won't be able to make a grab for it so he slides back to the wall he was leaning against. It's like a dance; Castiel mirrors his every move, each time coming closer and closer until he's only barely at hands reach from Dean.

"If you don't desire me, prove it," He says, voice barely above a whisper. His eyes flick up to Dean's face, gazing towards his lips suggestively. Dean knows it's not him. It's _not_ him.

But.

He has the same opaque blue eyes, same crinkles and laughter lines, same tousled hair. He sounds like him when he's encouraging him to give in, feels like him when he grips his waist.

And suddenly, Dean doesn't care that this isn't Cas. It's the only chance he'll get to be with him like this. He leans down and kisses him, hands fisting his shirt in an effort to remain same. He flattens his hands against his chest, lips moving frantically against Cas', and that's when he feels it. Or rather, doesn't.

No heartbeat.

He blindly grabs whatever he can find, pushing it in front of himself just as Castiel punches straight through it. Dean gasps as they pull apart and a small part of him wishes it didn't end. The Qareen lunges towards him and Dean jumps out of the way, moving towards another wall. He hides behind it, barely having a chance to breathe before Castiel punches straight through the drywall. He jumps and rolls under a block of cutting wood. Castiel breaks it as well and Dean barely has any time to roll away. He grabs the metal rod and aims it right at Castiel but he catches it, giving Dean a small smile before twisting his arm so the rod falls out of his hand.

Dean lets out a small grunt of pain as he's pushed against the wall. Castiel lifts up his fist, aiming it directly at Dean's chest. He pulls it back and lets go. Dean faintly wonders if this is really the way he's going to die when Castiel's hand stops, inches from his chest. Dean looks at him with wide eyes and Castiel steps away, letting out a pained scream as his chest glows blue and he vanishes into gray dust.

Dean is left gasping for air.

"Dean?" Sam calls from the stairs.

"Yeah?" Dean manages, but only barely. Sam appears from behind the plastic drapes.

"I got it. It's done. You good?" He asks and Dean glances back at the place where Castiel was standing.

"Mhm," He squeaks, walking past Sam and out of the salon.

 

"So, are you gonna keep me in suspense here or what?" Sam asks later as they're packing their things in their hotel.

"What?" Dean asks, looking away.

"Bach or Simpson?" Sam questions.

"Neither," Dean answers with a slight tremor in his voice. Sam hums but doesn't press the issue. Dean stares down at his bag for a moment before sighing and standing up straight.

"It was..."

Sam doesn't look at him but Dean could see him waiting for the answer.

"Cas," He whispers and the moment the name leaves his lips he wishes he never said anything. He looks to Sam for his reaction but he's packing as if he didn't hear. Maybe he hasn't.

"Cool," Sam says when he does turn around and Dean lifts a questioning brow at him.

"You're not - grossed out? Mad?" He asks in disbelief. Sam shrugs his shoulders and shakes his head.

"As if I couldn't see it before?" He says and Dean is abashed. Is he _that_ obvious?

"W-What?" He splutters, shaking his head.

"Seriously, Dean. You have heart eyes every time you look at him. It's really not that hard to figure out," Sam says, with another shrug. He passes by Dean without another word, leaving him stuttering and blushing. At the door he turns around and smiles.

"So, Destiel?" He asks, scrunching his nose.

"Shuddap," Dean murmurs, grabbing his bag and pushing him out of the motel, shutting the door behind him.

 


End file.
